Dates for Sex

I’m pretty sure a lot of you folks have already heard of the expression “treat her mean and keep her keen,” but just like the burger-to-mustard-and-ketchup ratio, getting the right balance is critical in making it all come together perfectly. So if you like hot girls like I do almost as much as hamburgers you will want to master this technique and reap the benefits.

All those dating experts on magazines keep telling us how to score hot girls, and being mean to them, as we have been told, is often the way to go. However, what they don’t tell us is how to do it. Fortunately, through much trial and error, we’ve discovered the basics, and we are happy to share them with you.

The Law of Effort

This idea is often discussed by dating experts, and it is the concept saying that anything you’ve worked hard for is seen as something much treasured and more valuable. It’s just like that burrito you found at 4am when all other stores are closed it tastes so much better, right? The same thing applies here only sexier. Make her appreciate you by having a kind of status she will want to work for.

If she thinks she can have you at the snap of her fingers, she won’t be bothered. If she feels like she has got to go through hell and high water just to get your attention, she’ll immediately find you more desirable than Brad Pitt smothered in milk chocolate.

Don’t Be Too Available

Now that you have set your eyes on someone, it’s time to bring you’re A-game.

The best starting point is just to simply keep your cool, so avoid flooding her with text messages and pestering her for dates. Keep in mind that hot girls love the thrill of the chase, so be just a little out of her reach. This means no replying to her texts right away and saying you’re not available until a later date if she invites you to meet up.

Remember, Hot Girls Desire Attention

Hot girls desire, and are used to, attention, so depriving them of what they are used to will leave them puzzled, make them curious to know more about you and find the reason why you’re not hanging on to their every word.

Don’t Be a Jerk All the Time

Once she’s smitten, you can start going easy with the games. Now that you have her full attention, don’t be an idiot and start pushing her away. Once she’s “treated mean and kept keen,” most women will start wanting be treated by the perfect gentleman. Otherwise, she will realize she’d be better off with some other guy. Remember: balance is key.

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First you fall in love, you get married, and then unfortunately, now you’re getting divorced. Yes, this really sucks, but the good news is you are not alone. According to statistics, for every 1000 people, 6.8 get married and 3.4 end in divorce.

However, there are more important things to be concerned of than worry about the stigma attached to being a divorced guy they have to deal with court battles, and it can get ugly. If you are headed to Splitsville, here are a few dating tips online that you have to always keep in mind.

To begin with, never fear to initiate the divorce, because it simply doesn’t matter who files first. Next, keep in mind that your objective is to get out of court sooner than later. If your soon-to-be ex is taking you to court, it’s likely you’ll be tempted to act out of emotion and drag the process out as long as possible. What you need to do is focus more on the business side of the situation. With these basics in mind, here are a few seemingly harmless blunders guys make and dating tips online to guide them through the process.

Lose It

The words thrown at each other when married can be totally different when going through a divorce. They can be considered as threats, which can be used against you in court. So unless you want to have a restraining order against you, always keep your cool.

Abuse Social Media

Posting pictures of the latest girl you hooked up with or tweeting about your latest clubbing adventures are alright, unless you’re going through a divorce. What you put out on the Internet can be used against you in court. You don’t have to deactivate your account; just play it smart. And when in doubt, avoid updating your status.

Flaunt the New Girl

It’s alright to have a girlfriend after you’ve decided to get a divorce, but it wouldn’t be prudent to parade her around. Showing off your new arm candy will likely upset your ex and may lead her to give you the ultimate payback. The smart thing to do is hold off the parade until the whole process is over.

Volunteer to Move Out

The moment people decide to go their separate ways, it’s often the guy who volunteers to move out. This is not necessary. Do not do this if you’re both living there because it’s going to cost you more money. You will have to pay rent, and at the same time support that other household. It may be hard to still live with the woman you’re divorcing during the proceedings, but it’s best to hold your ground, and cost-effective too.

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Even if you did not graduate from one of the horniest universities in the country, it is very likely that some time during your college endeavor, a potential boyfriend looking for sex gave you his most seductive smile and asked, “So, what’s your major?”

And after finding out about your college major, maybe this young eager beaver co-ed tried his luck by trying to impress you with his familiarity with your field.  We have come up with the most terrible pickup lines from guys looking for sex for a few college majors.  If somebody tries to use one of these on you, run fast on the opposite direction.

    Architecture majors:  Can you grant me permission to erect an edifice on your private property?

    Art majors:  So you’re an art major… I can let you draw me naked anytime.

    Biological Science majors:  I love studying anatomy… especially yours.

    Computer Science majors:  I would love to examine your back end.

    English majors:  Are you into John Donne’s written works?  Why don’t I help you study by getting metaphysical together?

    Finance majors:  You are looking to be the next hot commodity.  I would love to take you home and to a deep study of your major assets on my spreadsheets.

    French majors:  Voulez-vous coucher avec moi ce soir?

    Geology majors:  How would you like to go on an expedition to explore the rocks in my jock?

    History majors:  You know what they say:  History has a tendency to repeat itself.  Let’s try to break that cycle by having a one-night stand.

    Library Science majors:  You can come over anytime and catalogue my library.

    Math majors:  Do you mind if I do a rough estimate the slope of your curves?

    Music majors:  They tell me I have a high level of expertise in playing the organ.

    Paleontology majors:  Do you want to see a type of bone that won’t go extinct?

    Physics major:  Is that a radioactive dress?  Because there sure is a lot of fallout.

    Political Science majors:  Are you working on the Locke-Rousseau paper?  How about we re-enact the State of Nature?

    Sociology majors:  Do you want to do something taboo and just pretend it’s a norm?

    Theater majors:  I was just cast as Don Juan DeMarco on an upcoming play.  Mind if you help me do a little research on his character?

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Free casual sex in public places isn’t exactly a new phenomenon. Ask the members of the Mile High Club. However, this novelty practice seems to be developing into something more common one that makes the regular one-night stand seem unusual.



David, an aspiring Wall Street lawyer in his early 40s who asked not to be tagged with his real name, is about to propose to his girlfriend. He considers free casual sex in restaurant bathrooms the modern equivalent of forbidden trysts. “I’m almost married, so bathrooms are more like motels for me.”



Michael Kimmel, who is the author of “Guyland: The Inner World of Men, 18 – 26, says propagation of needed instantaneous free casual sex shows that both straight men and women are now appropriating what was then perceived as homosexual behavior. “In the gay culture,” says Kimmel, “there is the idea that you can hit a bar, have free casual sex, zip up, and then have a beer. Now, even women are having free casual sex like their male counterparts do sex for sex’s sake. It’s way easier for both straight and gay men to have sex whenever they want to.”



Shelly, a New York real estate broker in her 30s, provided support to Kimmel’s theory with her own story. Her bathroom taste focuses on a new aspect of stall sex: wealth. She isn’t defiling the bathroom stalls of local dive bars; she’s doing it in the classiest restaurants in Manhattan. “The stalls at Nobu in West 57th are the best,” she says. “You can lean over the sink and watch yourself in the mirror as you do the dirty deed.”



At velvet-rope clubs, like the Plumm in New York, stall sex is a privilege not only the wealthy take pleasure in but also those with preferred customer status. There is one exclusive room at the Plumm that has been specifically designed to hide stall fornicators. According to club owner Noel Ashman, they have a VIP bathroom that goes through the kitchen for its members with a special key that provides entry. When asked if sex really happens there, an unconcerned Ashman says, “I suppose it does.”



Amy Sacco, club owner of celebrity infested Bungalow 8, is similarly undaunted by the practice, although, she takes note of a potential hassle. “It’s no surprise if people are having sex in my bathrooms mine are divine,” she says. “But hopefully they all make it fast I hate it when the lines starts to get long.”



Free casual sex in public places isn’t exactly a new phenomenon. Ask the members of the Mile High Club. However, this novelty practice seems to be developing into something more common one that makes the regular one-night stand seem unusual.



David, an aspiring Wall Street lawyer in his early 40s who asked not to be tagged with his real name, is about to propose to his girlfriend. He considers free casual sex in restaurant bathrooms the modern equivalent of forbidden trysts. “I’m almost married, so bathrooms are more like motels for me.”



Michael Kimmel, who is the author of “Guyland: The Inner World of Men, 18 – 26, says propagation of needed instantaneous free casual sex shows that both straight men and women are now appropriating what was then perceived as homosexual behavior. “In the gay culture,” says Kimmel, “there is the idea that you can hit a bar, have free casual sex, zip up, and then have a beer. Now, even women are having free casual sex like their male counterparts do sex for sex’s sake. It’s way easier for both straight and gay men to have sex whenever they want to.”



Shelly, a New York real estate broker in her 30s, provided support to Kimmel’s theory with her own story. Her bathroom taste focuses on a new aspect of stall sex: wealth. She isn’t defiling the bathroom stalls of local dive bars; she’s doing it in the classiest restaurants in Manhattan. “The stalls at Nobu in West 57th are the best,” she says. “You can lean over the sink and watch yourself in the mirror as you do the dirty deed.”



At velvet-rope clubs, like the Plumm in New York, stall sex is a privilege not only the wealthy take pleasure in but also those with preferred customer status. There is one exclusive room at the Plumm that has been specifically designed to hide stall fornicators. According to club owner Noel Ashman, they have a VIP bathroom that goes through the kitchen for its members with a special key that provides entry. When asked if sex really happens there, an unconcerned Ashman says, “I suppose it does.”



Amy Sacco, club owner of celebrity infested Bungalow 8, is similarly undaunted by the practice, although, she takes note of a potential hassle. “It’s no surprise if people are having sex in my bathrooms mine are divine,” she says. “But hopefully they all make it fast I hate it when the lines starts to get long.”

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Recently, a “trend” piece was published about how the majority of college guys prefer hookup dating over relationships. Naturally, female college students are at an uproar over this alarming pattern. Here’s the thing: You’ve probably been hookup dating for maybe four to eight years, and hopefully have another four to eight years of hookup dating in the future. And if you are fortunate enough, you still have 30 – 50 years of one relationship to look forward to. Give it a rest, girls. Here are a few reasons why men choose hookup dating over a relationship.

• Variety

Variety is the spice of life. It helps us to avoid turning into zombie robots. It even helps define men who they really are and what they want in a woman. You go hookup dating with just one girl and you haven’t the slightest idea what other lips, boobs, butts, and vaginas feel, smell and taste like.

• It’s convenient

Most men, if not all, are creatures of convenience. And while most would argue that it can’t get any more convenient than having a steady, dedicated girlfriend who can be at your side, in your bed waiting, this is highly debatable. If you fuck it up with your girlfriend, you’ll be spending days, weeks or months in the doghouse. Now if you fuck it up with a hook up, you can either give her a half-ass apology and hope to keep her in your circles or move on to the next girl that comes along. It’s that simple.

• It’s inexpensive

It’s pretty obvious that being single is way less expensive than being in a relationship. You will often have to dine in expensive restaurants and your girlfriend will go for the finer things in life. There will be birthdays, anniversaries, holidays, vacations, etc. Well, you get the picture.

• It’s educational

This goes hand-in-hand with variety as well, because the more you hook up with different girls, the more knowledgeable you are, not just in matters of sex, but also as a person. You develop different social skills like listening, empathy, sympathy and ultimately become well-rounded.

• It’s less stressful

It seems that everyone is stressed these days for whatever reason, so why add to the stress with being in a committed relationship where you follow all these rules and regulations? Yeah, I thought so.

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She has a ton of emotional baggage, a anti-anxiety drug habit, and daddy issues. However, despite countless times of being burned, you’re helpless against a hot crazy woman. Also, have you ever gone adult dating a crazy girl and lived to tell the tale?

For Ben, a 35-year old property investor from New York, it was Tiffany. Tiffany was a publicist also from New York—with model features, a bad habit when it came to acquiring mod vintage clothing, and a fanatic obsession with Nietzsche and Amy Winehouse. She was disarmingly beautiful and brilliant, but she also had a dark side.

Tiffany was paranoid. She believed some people are trying to kill her, a pathologic liar obsessed with men in positions of authority, and was also prone to random episodes of crying. None of this made Ben think of going for easier romantic pursuits. On the contrary, he was hooked.

This was the sort of adult dating scenario where you see her as this wounded bird that you just constantly want to repair. It’s just like the Stockholm syndrome—you become sympathetic to your captors instead of realizing, “Oh shit, I’m the hostage!”

In all likelihood, you’ve dated a woman like this. Your friends sounded the alarm which you willfully ignored and your parents pleaded for you to stop seeing her. She’s the crazy girl—the reason that made everyone seriously think about your sanity and fear for your future. Her identity can vary, but whatever it is, it’s highly probably she is intoxicatingly sexy, intense, unstable, mercurial, and impossible to be at ease around in social settings. She was completely exhausting to be with. So why the hell was she so compelling?

Perhaps whenever you fancy someone who has the potential to lose themselves or change in front of your very eyes, there is something attractive with that. Being with her has the ability to transform who you are because someone has just thrown her marbles on the floor and you have no clue when they’re doing it again. It is definitely not an adult dating relationship based on trust.

Of course, it’s not a relationship based on trust. It’s about ungoverned recklessness, chaos, and surreal escapism and unpredictability. An excitement that’s so rare and so powerful, you totally forget to give a shit about consequences and personal sacrifices. That kind of relationship has the potential to take you down a dark mountain road on a tricked out Harley, going over the speed limit.

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I’m pretty sure everybody has had their share of fuck buddies. It starts off as being the best pseudo relationship ever, because it’s really not a real relationship to begin with. “You think I’m hot, I think you’re hot, so let’s get it on.” It’s that simple. The number one rule to follow is to keep it casual. However, why should there be rules to follow anyway? The reason behind this is because some people just don’t get the dynamics of being fuck buddies. To help our more unfortunate brethren who are in search for sex sans strings, here are our rules of engagement.

1. Both parties should lay all their cards on the table and be totally honest with their intentions from the get go. Failure to stay true to their word is subject for dismissal.

2. Both parties shall bolster their honest words with actions that are in line with the initial arrangement. Actions indicating otherwise will lead to a breach in verbal contract.

3. If one party gets attached, it is their responsibility to tell the other. Silence will be understood as compliance.

4. Both parties shall keep sending text messages to a minimum. Each text message exchange can be flirtatious, but should be bereft of romanticism and flowery or sweet words.

5. Daily rendezvous and meet ups are strictly prohibited. Hanging out in groups on a weekly basis is encouraged.

6. Do not, under any circumstances, invite her to your place to cook meals for her, give her back rubs or do anything else a boyfriend would do.

7. Refrain from planning. All plans shall be made in the moment and should be for the next hour. Any plans made beyond that shall be considered a date, therefore voiding your status of being fuck buddies.

8. There shall be no formal introductions to each other’s families. Chance encounters shall be dealt with improvisation, during which you refer to each other as colleagues, and then end with the party whose family is not there to leave and meet up with their better half. Any sort of physical contact is not allowed during this encounter.

9. If one party falls ill, the other shall keep away and check in from remote locations once standard time of infection has elapsed.

10. Always hold on to the impression that the other party is seeing, dating, or hooking up with other parties regardless if it is not the case. If another party intends to hook up with your fellow fuck buddy, by all means support it or opt out and look for another hook up for the night.

11. You shall not cuddle or spoon after doing the deed. Once you have claimed all the benefits, roll over to the other side and fall asleep without unnecessarily touching your fellow fuck buddy.

Always keep these rules in mind and you should be alright. But, of course, you should not be overthinking about this. If you are, then it’s time to bail.

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Being single during the holiday season may have its advantages: That’s one less present you have to give and a whole lot of flirting going on for you in the party circuit. However, there are many women who strongly desire to have an adult dating partner to ring in the New Year with. If that’s what you really want, make it happen by snagging that guy you’ve been hanging out with and go for these creative and inexpensive adult dating ideas.

• Surprise your man with a date that will have his mind blown: an MMA match, shooting range, wine tasting tour. He’s going to love your creativity.

• Go on a day hike and bask in the wonderful autumn colors of a woodsy trail. You’ll both feel good and alive, connected to nature and to each other.

• Instead of having a few beers at a local pub, go to a wine bar. Sharing a new experience together causes the brain to give you a chemical rush akin to the rush of attraction.

• It doesn’t matter if Halloween is over. Go ahead and pop in a cheesy-scary DVD movie like “Zombieland” and you can laugh or cower at the scary and funny parts.

• Invite him over for some delicious homemade s’mores you just cook on your stovetop. It’s a saccharine gesture that’s not as loaded and as time-consuming as cooking up a fancy spread.

• Go out to see a college football game. Men love anything that has to do with sports and competition.

• Doing something new spontaneously can be exciting. Pick a town you’ve never visited before within a few hours of where you both live, Google Map it or set your GPS, get in your car and go on a road trip.

• Try ice skating, and don’t be afraid to be bad at it. It will give you something silly to bond over.

• On the next full moon, invite him to take a long walk. Try not to speak to too much and just hold each other’s hands under the moonlight.

• If snow falls early in the season, take a cheap plastic sled up a nearby hill. You will feel free, child-like and unguarded with playing in the snow.

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It is one of the most terrible, most gut-wrenching things a guy can do, and they do it with as much courtesy as whipping an old nun with her rosary. We can definitely do better. Here are a few things to keep in mind when dumping your adult dating partner.

• Forget about maintaining your status as the nicest guy on the planet. Don’t take away the opportunity for her to fuckin’ hate your guts.

• Don’t use that pathetic cliché “it’s not you, it’s me” and that “you’re too good for me” crap. Being condescending when breaking up with your adult dating partner is as shameful as sending her a text message saying that you’re leaving. And never ever set sail on a long, painful mission to inflict low-level torture and slowly accumulating emotional distance to your adult dating partner until she finally breaks down because you were such a coward to do it at first.

• Make a clean break. This means no hesitations and definitely no make-up sex, unless, of course, she’s relieved that it’s over—fine with it in every way—and still wants to fool around every once in a while.

• Take note, she might be happier about this happening than you are.

• It was believed that JFK sent a bouquet of flowers to the women he was breaking it off with. And while we can’t fully confirm the truth about this nor condone it, we highly recommend the sentiment behind it.

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Since adult dating has a lot of potential for disastrous situations, they should be calling it “playing in a minefield.” To help you get through it unscathed, here are adult dating pointers to serve as a guide when going out.

• Rule number one: Chemistry outranks everything else. Even if he chattered on too much about his Prius or had a piece of meat stuck between his teeth, if his kiss blew you away, he deserves a second date.
• Conversely, it doesn’t matter if he’s the hottest, wealthiest, and funniest Ryan Goslingest man ever, if liplocking with him gives you the Willies, cut your losses and run for the hills.
• When you finally meet up with a guy you connected with at an online adult dating website in a café, it’s alright to tell your friends you “met at a café.” It’s not even considered a lie—well, sort of.
• It’s okay to be superficial. If he meets up with you wearing a fanny pack or in jeans showing his butt crack, pretend you have an emergency and split. Hint: Tell him it’s a girl thing and he won’t ask anymore questions.
• Every time a buddy sets you up for a date, always remember to ask her what she thinks are the things you have in common with the potential partner, besides the fact that you are both single.
• FYI: If he spends even a short time during your date to respond to work emails on his smart phone, it is very likely he wouldn’t be the most attentive boyfriend.
• On the other hand, if you spend even a short time during your date to respond to your work emails, don’t expect to receive an invitation to go out on a second date.
• Be wary of the sly guy that asks questions so he can answer. Sly guy: So, what are the most awesome places you have been to? You: Oh, probably the Baham—. Sly guy: The best I’ve been to so far are Paris, Africa, Milan, London…
• There are a lot of people in between jobs right now, but a guy who blames The Man as his reason for being unemployed is most likely retarded.
• If you can’t recall anything clever he said or don’t find him even remotely interesting and you weren’t having drinks, you’re probably not that into him.
• He probably is just being polite, but whenever a guy offers you a breath mint, always take them, just in case.
• Going out on dates are supposed to be fun, so when you’re out in the middle of one and you start daydreaming about watching Friends reruns at home, give yourself a break.
• Don’t stress yourself out and think too much about that first kiss moment. Just smile, say your goodbyes and affectionately squeeze his hand, letting your fingers linger. This is his cue to make a move. If he doesn’t, you can make your exit with zero awkwardness.

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